Wild Mushroom ID Guide that won't get you killed or sick...
So looking at Rubberheads thread, I wanted to explain what wild mushrooms I will seek out, pick, and eat despite the fact that I am not a mycologist, I do not spore-print, and I don't do microscopic spore examination. In other words, I only eat Mushrooms that I know for certain are safe, easy to ID, and have no look-alike that any reasonable person with average eye-sight and reasonable reading comprehension skills would ever confuse with the real deal. The only mushrooms on this list that have supposed "look-alikes" that MIGHT fool a careless, reckless person with poor vision are the Morel and the Chanterelle. That said, the false Morel is very distinct once you see it, and you'd almost have to be trying to make one into a Morel in your mind for you to ever confuse the two. The Chanterelle is also very distinct and other than the similar color of its look alike/alikes, the "look-alikes" have absolute differences that are easy to see. I'm posting this because I want y'all to enjoy some of the common wild mushrooms that you are walking over and past each and every year and have the confidence to do so safely.
DISCLAIMER...If you can't see worth a crap and/or do not have good reading comprehension skills and/or are the kind of person that would try to talk yourself into believing something when it clearly isn't the case and/or would eat something without knowing whether it will kill your or not just because it likely won't...Don't use this or any guide for picking and eating wild mushrooms...just go to the store. I am not responsible if one of you goes out and does something this guide tells you not to do and/or mis-IDs a mushroom, because if you can read this and follow these how-to's...there isn't any way you will eat something harmful.
So....Here goes.
I only pick and eat the following wild mushrooms, and unless you are a skilled amateur mycologist, mycologist, or in some other way a mushroom expert, I highly suggest sticking to these, as they are easy to ID, have no or very few "dangerous look-alikes" (which are very easy to ID and avoid), and are relatively easy to find and plentiful.
Boletes, Chanterelles, Lobster Mushrooms, Hen of the Woods aka. Miatake, Oysters, Chicken of the Woods, Lions Mane, and Morels,
Anything else....any white-gilled or LBMs(little brown mushrooms)...anything not on this list, PLEASE DONT EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!
1. Bolete Mushrooms
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Boletes are the shrooms that have the spongy underside where you usually find gills. Look at Rubberhead's mushroom post and notice the mushrooms that are bruising blue; those and the others that do not have what appear to be "normal" gills are Boletes. Google them. If you are confused at this point, don't continue and stick with mushrooms from the grocery store.
Boletes are found during warmer months (spring, summer, and fall) in woods, parks, yards, mountains etc.
Here is a very safe way to enjoy boletes without getting sick or ruining your meal.
No boletes are going to kill you unless you are horribly allergic to them....and you aren't, and there are no other mushrooms that you will confuse with a Bolete.
Some Boletes bruise blue. Some of the blue bruisers are good to eat, but there are far more that bruise blue that are NOT good to eat. The ones that bruise blue that are NOT good to eat will not kill you, but from what I've heard, you will wish you were dead while you puke it out of your system. So, simply DO NOT EAT ANY BOLETE THAT BRUISES BLUE unless you decide to become a really good amateur mycologist...just leave them in the woods.
Of the Boletes that don't bruise...ie, they do not change color when you squeeze or scratch their surface...many are prized and freaking fantastic, many are just really tasty, and some are bitter as hades and will turn your mouth inside out in a bad way.
The BITTER BOLETES that don't bruise blue (we are not dong blue bruisers) range from really bitter to just unpleasant, but they won't make you sick...of course, no-one has likely ever finished a bite and swallowed one, because they are awful. I actually cooked one up and dug in with gusto before I understood what I'm laying out now, and three good chews in and I knew I had screwed up...it took about five bourbon neats to get past it. So, how do you know which ones are bitter and which ones are going to be great.
Here is a quick and easy way to figure it out, and it's worked every time for me. When you find a bolete that isn't bruising a different color, pick a little chunk off of it....it does not have to be much of a chunk at all...and stick it in you mouth and chew it a bit with your front teeth and give it enough time where you can taste it....DO NOT SWALLOW....you don't ever want to eat any mushroom without cooking it thoroughly. Anyhoo...just taste it and spit it out. If it is a bitter variety, you'll damn sure know it, but you won't have coated all your taste-buds in rotten-ass- flavor, so spit it out and wash with water (have water or soda handy or wait till you do) and keep on keeping on. If you find yourself asking "is that bitter?" its probably is a bitter that isn't horrible, but it won't be good. When you taste a good one, you will know it it is not bitter...it will have very little flavor and be blandish or it will have a pleasant taste, but there will be absolutely no hint of bitterness.
If it is not bitter, pick it, put it in your sack, take it home, and cook and eat it. it will range from really good to really, really, dammit good when you cook it up, so pick that sucker and throw it in the bag.
I have picked many varieties of boletes out of my parents yard and in various woods and have used this method; it's simple and it has worked every time. You'd think after a while you could figure out which are which, and maybe some of you more discerning folks can, but I have not been able to tell from just looking at the mushroom. More than once, I've had two boletes picked from the same area that I'd swear were the same type only for one to be a good, non-bitter and the other to be a bitter. It's well worth trying them and cooking up the non-bitter ones...very, very delicious.
2. Chanterelles
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Chanterelles will be Yellow to Orange and have false gills that are actually just folds in the underside of the cap. The false gills are NOT papery and fragile. A false Chanterelle likely won't kill you, but it will make you sick as shit. BUT they are easy to identify, and once you see one, you will realize that it is not an easy mistake to make if you are half ass looking and know this information.
So, these will range from pale yellow...especially the young buttons...to vibrant Orange and you will find for days after it rains and when it's dog-days-of-summer-hot. You will find them in the forrest, but they will pop up in pines and hardwoods and they like washed our areas and trails. Baby start off with a button cap that become a big trumpet looking cap as it gets bigger and reaches maturity. They have false gills or folds that run onto the stem. The false gills are not fragile and papery. THEY ALWAYS GROW OUT OF THE DIRT/SOIL !!!!! If it's growing on wood, it is NOT a chanterelle.
The only way to get fooled by a look-alike orange shroom called the false chanterelle and/or Jack o Lantern (BAD NEWS PUKER) is if the a Jack O Lantern is growing from a stick that is buried in the dirt AND you don't recognize this situation AND you somehow mistake the Jack o Lantern's true gills for the Chants false gills...probably not going to happen unless you are nearly blind and really unlucky. Anyhoo...Chants are probably going to be growing with a bunch of other chants. I prefer the smaller, younger ones and I don't let them grow and come back when they are bigger. The smaller little button ones are firm and more flavorful, they don't require any slicing before cooking, and they require a lot less washing. That said, I pick them all, because they are great. Quit being pussys; if you find what you think is a patch of chants, pick them. Come reference this thread and other resources, but try to get to a place of comfort with your ID and cook and eat the damn things. You can always post a pic here and get confirmation in about ten seconds.
Jack O Lanterns (BAD)....like I said...they WILL BE GROWING FROM WOOD. Not sure if the false chants are the same as JOLs, but if they are different, they will still have a stalk/stem that will attach to the center of the underside of the cap and will have papery, delicate true gills that do not extend down and feather into the stem. While they may be growing somewhere in or around a chanty patch, I've never seen a bunch all spread out in and amongst them in a manner that would fool you. I've seen them next to chanty's, but they were far less of them, growing from a dead and decaying log, and are clearly different. Again, they have papery, delicate true gills that all end where the cap meets the stem...ie they don't feather terminate along the stem, and most of them have caps that are symmetrical around where the stem attaches and do not mature into the trumpet shape of the chants.
if you find a bunch of yellow/orange mushrooms growing in patches together from the ground and big ones are trumpet like, they are highly likely to be Chants...you are good to go. Look for a false chant or Jack o Lantern growing from wood. When you find one, you'll recognize what I'm describing; once you find and compare, you will never doubt it again.
3. Lobster Mushroom.
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Lobsters have the color of cooked crab leg meat. They look like a mutated glob of something that sort of resembles a mushroom....because it is some type of parasitic fungus that literally engulfs and consumes another mushroom. Once you see one, you'll know it. The flesh is ultra firm, and the ones I've found were very smooth. So, from my research when I found the ones I found...the parasitized mushroom is most often a rusella variety, but the fungus that does the parasitizing may engulf ANY type of mushroom that it is near...yes, even the Angel of Death and other equally deadly mushrooms. The research clearly said that once the aggressor fungus engulfs whatever mushroom it "chooses." the toxins in the host mushroom are neutralized...thus all Lobster mushrooms are theoretically safe to eat. I ate the ones I found, because there were plenty of rusella mushrooms growing nearby, and the overall shape appeared to be that of an engulfed rusella. I'm not sure I'm buying the whole neutralized toxin thing, so do your own research on these. I would let them grow as long as they are growing and not showing signs of decline, as it would give it more time to neutralize any toxins...that's my theory anyway. I will say that so far, they are the tastiest, meatiest, and most enjoyable mushroom I've ever eaten.
4. Hen of the Woods.
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Holy Chit! Find them at the base of BIG OLD MATURE Oak trees in the forest or in yards, cemeteries, or parks in the fall. There is no mistaking it at all. Nothing looks remotely similar. They range from almost white to dark brown. These are worth letting grow to maturity if you can check on them very frequently if not daily, as they will put on a lot of poundage and will taste great as long as they are growing, not getting dried out, and not getting overrun with mold or eaten by the bugs that call them home. If you find one and you are not going to be able to check on it regularly, harvest it even if it is the size of a softball. If you can check on it daily or every other day, let it grow until the fronds start getting more tough/leathery/more difficult to break off than they were the day before or until they start getting dried out to any degree. Once you see any of these signs of decline, then harvest it and get every bit of it down to where it comes out of the ground. If it's big and fresh, just go ahead and harvest it, and don't chance its decline.
Take these to a sink and cut away any of the stalk/base that is obviously tough. The stalk/base will always be FIRMER than the petals/fronds, but firm is good to go...don't mistake firm for tough, because the entire mushroom is premium choice awesomeness, and you don't want to waste a single good piece. Start peeling off each of the fronds/petals...which will eventually lead to you stripping some of the stalk off with them...thats cool as long as it isn't tough. Break it up into individual fronds and slice up any of the solid stalk/base that is left. Do this in a sink and float the mushroom bits in water for a while as you collect and dispose of all the creepy-crawlies that stay at hotel Hen each fall. There will be a variety of insects including the occasional slug, worm, centipede, beetle, ant, spider etc living in the folds of the shroom, because...well, if you were a bug you'd live there too, and you'll understand when you start breaking one down. They wash right off/out and don't hurt the mushroom a bit, so buck up and deal with them...worst case scenario is you'll eat some protein and never even know it.
You will also be doing a good bit of stick/dirt removal as you break it up and soak it, as these things just grow up and around everything in their paths; the bits of sticks and dirt just fall deep into the creases of the folds as it grows. It takes a little more time than cleaning up chants picked from a nice bed of pine needles, but it is worth the effort. Just one large hen can provide you with enough for the entire season, and you will end up having to figure out a way to preserve them for later use. I take excess hen's and steam them, put them in a ziplock baggie, and then pour enough of the steamer juice/water in to cover them...then throw them in the freezer to thaw, sauté, and enjoy later.
5.Oyster Mushrooms
Oysters are another no-brainer. Oysters grow in a "shelf-like" manner on dead or dying hardwood trees or stumps. There are a ton of shelf mushrooms out there that you will run into, but Oysters will be one of only two shelf mushrooms that has any semblance of an "edible consistency." Most shelf mushrooms are going to be leathery and tough (Turkey Tails) or downright hard and brick like (artists conch). You can actually step up and stand on some growing off the sides of trees. That said, an oyster will be soft and meaty and the stem "attaches" to the cap asymmetrically...ie. offset to one side or the other in some degree. The gills run down the stem a little bit from the cap and terminate on the stem. They vary from white to brown with every shade of the mix of the those two colors...although they are usually whiter than brown and the browner ones tend to have a golden brown color.
Oysters ALWAYS grow on wood. If you think you have found oysters growing from dirt, you are wrong; DON'T eat whatever it is you found. Oysters can pop suddenly...ie, one day they are not there, the next day there will be a few smalls and matures, and the next day the entire log may be completely covered up. Pick them when you find them, as they usually will quickly start going mushy if the weather/environment stays overly wet, and they will dry up and get tough quickly if the weather/environment heats and dries up quickly or the relative humidity plunges. If they are there, pick them and just come back day after day until the flush is done. Some folks say they smell like anise or licorice....I don't really get that, but I guess it's close. All oysters, however you choose to describe it, have a unique, pleasant (at least not unpleasant) smell that is the same no matter what subspecies you are picking no matter where you are picking them. Once you find them and smell them, verify them, and eat them....you'll always be able to ID them even blindfolded simply by the smell. The smell + the other characteristics make this a safe and easy no-brainer. There aren't really any look alike shelf mushrooms growing on trees that you would mistake for an oyster. They are fantastic and a good tree with good conditions can carry you on and off throughout the spring/summer/fall.
6. Chicken of the Woods
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Chickens are Easy to ID...look them up. The orange ones look a LOT like the Lobster Mushroom as far as color and texture, but they are shelf mushrooms that grow on dead or dying trees where lobsters will be found on the forest floor. I haven't ever tried them. The only ones I ever found that seemed fresh were growing on a downed hemlock tree, so I passed. I hear they are delicious, but they don't sit well with a lot of people, and they can make those folks nauseated and cause some epic shits. Most folks say just try a little bit at first and give yourself plenty of time to find out if you are one of the folks that they aren't going to sit well with...if you don't get nauseated or have a massive case of the runs, you are good to go and they are supposedly delicious. I've got too many other shrooms I like to be taking a chance on these not sitting well with me...maybe someday.
7. Lions Mane..
Lion's Mane supposedly tastes like or has consistency of Lobster Meat. I've never found one, and I want to BAD. Look them up; you can't mis-ID this one and there are certainly no look alike. It's a no-brainer; if you find one, climb the tree if you have to, but harvest it and enjoy. If you find one and aren't wanting to "take the chance," pin me the location, and I'll go get it.
8. Morel Mushroom.
Last but certainly not least is the Morel. If you find some, they will likely be there year after year in the spring when the soil temps hit ~60 degrees. These are leprechauns. Lots of folks say they know when they will pop based on blah, blah, blah....my experience is they will pop about the same time each year in whatever area you find them, the ones popping there will probably be popping at a different time than ones in some other patch just a county or two or maybe even just a ridge or two away. Moisture is good. But it's variable. These things are truly mysterious. They have a hollow stem and look like a brain on a stalk. They are freaking incredible, nutty wonders of culinary awesomeness. Lots of people stuff them with cheese etc., batter them, and fry them. It is my opinion that this is akin to cooking a fine steak to extra well done and chasing it with Mad Dog 20/20. Sautee in butter and enjoy the flavor of the mushroom, because it is extraordinary. You only have the False Morel to "worry" about. If you simply slice all your morels in half lengthwise from top to bottom, you will never have to worry about eating a falsie, because the stem is hollow on a true morel.
FALSE MOREL: sort of looks like a morel...kinda like a morel would look like if you ate too many of the cow-patty shrooms. The stem on a false morel is solid and not hollow...so anyone eating a false morel deserves all the GI upset that might ensue. There are several varieties of false morels that are very tasty and will not cause any GI distress or illness, but why chance it? Don't eat them.
Bonus Material....I mentioned the turkey tail mushroom earlier. It is a shelf mushroom that is smaller and flat and resembles a turkey tail. It is fibrous and leathery. I don't think I've ever heard anyone say it tastes good. That said, they have incredibly potent anti-cancer chemistry within them, and you can supposedly grind or blender them into a powder and sprinkle on food or put in soups.
The Hen of the Woods is also well known for its anti-cancer chemistry.
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Bonus Bonus Material...I also mentioned that oysters were one of two shelf mushrooms you might find that have a consistency that you'd recognize as "Edible." The other is the Pheasant Back. These things grow on dead and dying trees and you will often find several together, but not as "together" as the oysters. They have a pretty, mottled coloration that resembles a pheasant's back...go figure. You will know this mushroom when you break it off the tree and smell it. It smells strongly of watermelon rind, and it truly does smell exactly like a watermelon rind. If you can get one big enough, yet fresh/young enough, you can cut the soft, fleshy outer portion away from the tougher stem area. The soft and fleshy quickly transitions into fibrous and tough near the center and stem area. These are actually pretty damn good sautéed in butter...getting one that big enough to fool with that hasn't extended its leathery toughness to the outer portion of the mushroom is the tricky part.
I certainly hope that someone on here will find this helpful and that Rubberhead and Woodie (at least) will find enough confidence in this to start picking and eating all these God given, healthy goodies. If not...Y'all know I like to type shit, so no sweat! When you start picking and eating these wild wonders, just don't get carried away with the wine, beer, and or bourbon...you might end up in a swamp at 3am realizing that you just may have enjoyed it a little too much!
Peace!
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Originally Posted by Carolina Counsel
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